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My Doug’s birthday is April 1st
Oh, Doug was a beautiful child. We would get stopped by strangers on the street who would comment about Doug’s long eyelashes and wonderful smile. He hardly ever cried as a baby. Doug’s demands on new parents were slight.
But then Doug didn’t babble. He was late in meeting all of the developmental milestones. He didn’t interact with people. He didn’t respond to mobiles or toys or my voice. He didn’t talk.
Autism is not fun, or cheap, or joyful in it’s content and style. The word autism is not something any parent wants to say outloud. Autism is never thought of as parents enter the delivery room nor is it a part of their plan for life’s journey. But when I look back on the past 38 years of Doug’s life, I see a baby, cuddled in my arms. I see a boy enjoying weeds as I place them in my crystal vase. I see a teen experiencing many of the same feelings that overwhelm his peers as well. Today, I see a man: working, searching, learning, talking to friends and family, finding his way in life just as all of us do.
I don’t ponder the fact that Doug was born on April Fool’s Day. I find that it brings smiles to the corners of my mouth, not because of the obvious connection with the day but the smiles are because I’m sooooo proud of Doug’s accomplishments and privileged to have learned from him.
I wrote this poem thinking that I was going to write an epic one in length and complexity. The poem, “I Never Told My Son He Couldn’t Dance,” was short and simple and honest. I spoke of Doug’s life and of my thoughts as well. I want to share this poem with you today on the eve of Doug’s birthday.
I Never Told My Son He Couldn’t Dance
I never told my son he couldn’t dance.
I never thought he didn’t have a chance.
I never told my son he might not read.
I only sought to plant the seed.
I never showed my son a star
That, I felt, was way too far.
I never taught my son to fly,
But I gave him wings on which to try.
I never questioned God’s intent.
I only hoped my time well spent.
We never know what life will bring.
I only know that I must sing.
I never told my son he couldn’t dance.
That is why he had a chance.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Today, at 38 years of age, Doug dances his way through life with vitality and composure. He graduated from Chaparral High School, Las Vegas, NV in 1991 with a class rank of 72 out of 475. He attended the University of Nevada Las Vegas where he was a drummer with the Star of Nevada Marching Band. Doug works at one of the major resorts on the Las Vegas Strip as a linen runner in one of the top ten spas in the world.
Doug drives his blue Cavalier, lives in our home, loves his two dogs and his family. The dance he does is perhaps a bit more awkward than some peoples. It may be slower and more rigid. But as Doug dances to life, my eyes shine with pride and my heart beats to the rhythm of his movements.
Happy Birthday, Doug.
You are loved.
Intentional Acts of Kindness. Read it. Do it. Feel it. Be it.
The Kindness Challenge Movement
“intentional acts of kindness”
The kindness challenge from Kathie’s World is growing rapidly.
These are intentional acts of kindness. They are not random, they are planned. These acts of kindness are not only for the people receiving but for the givers.
It is truly as rewarding to give as to receive.
My goal for collecting socks this year of 2009, to give to the homeless in Las Vegas, NV, at Thanksgiving, was set at 200 pair. As of this date, 3-31-09, the following numbers have been collected:
Men’s : 199 pair
Women’s: 42 pair
Children’s: 65 pair
~~~ DO THE WAVE ~~~
Other good things are happening because of the Kindness Challenge:
• 52 stocking hats were donated
• 6 stuffed animals have been collected
• Sunrise Hospital nursing staff is donating socks
• Jamie Eggspuehler of TX is donating copies of her new children’s book,
Sprinkled Ties, http://www.cuddleupbooks.net Jamie is
planning on her own Kindness Challenge in Dallas herself.
• Barbara Johnson of AZ, in her TCAA Senior Action Program Newsletter,
talked about Kathie’s World Kindness Challenge and challenged
her readers to a Kindness Challenge of their own.
They have organized and put together 32 Easter baskets with
stuffed animals, bubbles, toys, and treats for disadvantaged children
in their area.
~~~ DO THE WAVE ~~~
Please be a part of this Kindness Challenge Movement ?
Never, in our history, are intentional acts of kindness more needed than NOW!
When we give, we are called the giver.
It is the giver, who receives and knows what true Grace is.
And Grace, is God’s work in action.
~~~ DO THE WAVE ~~~
Please pass this on to your friends, links, business associates, etc.
Help make the Kindness Challenge Movement, move!
To Write Love on Her Arms
Jamie Tworkowski took a girl from the depths of dispair and transformed the memos of hate she had carved on her arms into messges of love. Thus, To Write Love On Her Arms was born and the movement has swept across the world for hope, love, grace, kindness, rehabilition, and assistance.
Central Christian Church of Las Vegas, NV
http://www.centralchristian.com, presented a weekend of services featuring Jamie Tworkowski and his movement To Write Love On Her Arms. This true story happeded only three short years ago and today it has grown into a world wide movement. The T-shirts and buttons are worn by rock bands across the world and inspire the “love movement.”
Inside each T-shirt you will find the entire original story penned by Jamie. They can now purchased on-line, at concerts, or at Hot Topics (7000 stores around the globe). The profit from sales are donated to helping people.
Jamie was fantastic as he was interviewed by Pastor Jud Wilhite of Central Christian. You can view the entire service on line. http://www.centralonlinecampus.com
You won’t be sorry. Go there and be a part of a movement that is linked by love.
Cushing’s Disease Awareness Day is April 8, 2009.
Could YOU have Cushing’s Disease and not even know it? Could someone you love have Cushing’s Disease and neither of you know it?
Cushing’s Disease is not nice. It is not fun. It is not cushy.
It can be deadly but more importantly, Cushing’s Disease can be cured.
Learn what the characteristics of Cushing’s Disease are. Look in the mirror with curious eyes and go to your doctor if you see what you hope you are not looking for. It could mean the difference between life and death.
Click on the Cushing’s page at the top of my website.
It could save your life or someone you love. Do it today!
World Autism Awareness Day
Get out your horns! Put on your party hats! World Autism Awareness Day is April 2nd. We can all make the world a better place for people and their families with autism. We, as parents and professionals, teach children and adults with autism but that is nothing compared to what THEY teach us about humanity and life.
Show them ~ grow with them ~ and know that
“Nobody ever rose to a low expectation.”
Socks and Friends
Enjoy this picture of some of my friends who are surrounded by packages of socks. These socks are being collected as an “intentional act of kindness” for homeless people on the streets of Las Vegas. They will be gifted to homeless veterans and others over the 2009 holiday season. To date, the collection consists of over 200 pair of heavy, athletic socks for men, women, and children.
YOU too can be a part of this experience. It’s so easy to send a pair or package of socks; it will warm your heart and the feet of another human being. That’s awesome and so is the fact that Wednesday’s Women from Central Christian Church are lending a hand to this “intentional act of kindness.”
So act now in your kindness mode and send those socks to:
Kathie Harrington, 3230 E. Flamingo #8, PMB 105, Las Vegas, NV, 89121
Thank you ~ I’ll be watching for your socks and you’ll be part of this big act of kindness.
I have known my little friend, Eilish, since she was less than two-years-old. Eilish has Down syndrome and today she is nine-and-a-half years of age. I worked with Eilish an her family as their speech/language pathologist and saw her grow from simple vocalizations to speaking in sentences, answering, and asking simple questions and understanding and using social language skills. But, she never asked her mother “why” about anything.
Parents of special children are patient. They plant seeds and wait for them to grow in many areas of childhood development. My friend, Eilish, is no different nor are her mother and father. I might mention here, however, that Eilish’s mother has been totally blind since birth. Through that blindness Shannon “sees” life in all of its colors and glories. She is an inspiration to all who know her. I’m lucky to be one of those.
So here is the scenero that Shannon E-mailed me a couple of days ago. It is heartwarming. It is a story of patience and love and longing. It is a testiment to time and never giving up on a parent’s dream.
Shannon’s Dream
I think this is pretty huge!
I’ll simply tell it, and you all can decide for yourselves.
I came upstairs with a glass of iced tea to read some email before
20/20, my favorite show. There was a bowl on my desk that Eilish and
I had shared some cookies out of earlier, and she’d left her computer
monitor and speakers on, (she knows better.)
I called to her and said, “Eilish. Please come here.” She began to head up the stairs, and as she was climbing, she said, “Why?”
Now most parents get the why question when their kids are about 3 or so. If you were to ask my mother and daddy, they’d tell you that my favorite question was “why?” or “how come?”
Until this very day, Eilish has never asked me why, and she’s nine and a
half years old. I was beginning to wonder if I’d ever hear “why” from her, though the good Lord knows I hear it enough from her older sister, I have heard it ever since she was 3 and it hasn’t slowed down much by 16.
Now Eilish has joined the “why” crowd. I couldn’t be happier, and I hope I
hear a heck of a lot more “whys” from her in the next ten years.
Washington, DC (February 26, 2009) – Today President Barack Obama unveiled a Fiscal Year 2010 budget proposal that includes $211 million for the Combating Autism Act (CAA). This is the first year since the passage of the CAA that direct funding for autism has been included in the President’s budget proposal. Passed in 2006, the CAA authorized $920 million in federal funding over five years to fight autism through biomedical and environmental research, surveillance, awareness and early identification.
YES ~ WE CAN!!!
In the March, 2009 issue of Glamour Magazine there is a story that stole my heart. “They’re Autistic ~ And They’re in Love” is the real life story of Lindsey Nebgeker and Dave Hamrick of Jackson, Mississippi. They were also featured on Good Morning America: ABCNEWS.com: Learning to Love on February 26.
Many don’t believe that people with high functioning autism and Asperger’s are capable of relationships. They don’t believe that people with an autism spectrum disorder want a relationship and most certainly not an intimate one. I guess they don’t believe they are capable of running their own lives let alone earning a living. Many skeptics are just that when it comes to people with autism.
It’s time to BELIEVE!
Jerry Newport is a well-known individual diagnosed with autism. He is a national speaker, author and a married man. Jerry and Mary were both diagnosed with autism when they were adults. They met, married, became estranged, and reunited. Just like Lindsey and Dave, in the Glamour story, Mary and Jerry continue on their venture to make sense of the world; to live in a world that tells them they are different every day of their lives. They want to be a part of what “normal” people do because they and their famlies believe they can.
What “normal” people do is not always normal either. What people with autism do to become normal is like climbing a mountain everyday. It takes courage, stamina, and sometimes ignoring what other people say and think. These are traits that many adults with autism have faced all their lives. They know the reality of feeling awkward in social situations and what it means to be rejected on many levels.
Shilo by Kathie Harrington
As the mother of a grown son with high functioning autism I have always instilled in my children that anything is possible if you believe in yourself. That doesn’t start, however, when you are an adult, that is instilled from birth regardless of a disability.
I have written a short story, “Shilo,” that will be published on line by The Wild Rose Press on May 8, 2009. This story is about two adults with autism who fall in love. They find harmony in a relationship that many thought could never be. They accept their disability. They find that valor and daring overcome their social awkwardness and they find that love can bloom in the middle of Iowa.
I invite you to read the fictional “Shilo,” and the non-fiction account of Lindsey and Dave. They’re just people, more normal than not, trying to make their way in the world; just like all of us are.
