Did you know this about autism? #2
Turn taking, or the lack of it, is the crux of what people with autism do not understand. The give and take of communication is what life is all about. We use turn taking skills every day and in every aspect of our existence.
Think about it:
a. non-verbal turn taking skills are best exemplified in driving a car or any vehicle. We have stop lights/signs, turns, emergency vehicles, etc., etc.
b. verbal turn taking is best illustrated by talking on a telephone. We can’t see the person on the other end – most of the time – be we understand that a pause indicates it is your turn to talk. Typical people hear and understand the subtle nuances of inflection, emotions, and when it is their turn to respond. People with autism need a lot of practice with telephone skills.
Let me share with you a couple of strategies that our family used in teaching essential turn taking skills.
a. Non-verbal diving skills were taught by playing Connect Four. This is a fast paced table game using both offensive and defensive skills. It is similar to an upright checker’s game but with much more speed. FIRST YOU GO FOR ACCURACY AND THEN YOU GO FOR SPEED. These skills aren’t learned overnight and they take a lot of practice.
b. Verbal telephone skills are turn taking at its core. A lot of people today are texting and that too, is turn taking. Our son would never answer a telephone. He’d lie under or beside it and it could ring 300 times! My strategy for initially teaching telephone skills was to tell Doug that I was going to the neighbors to borrow something. If the phone rang he was to get it. I imagine this was stressful for Doug but I thought it was necessary to desensitize him to his fear of answering the phone and eventually talking on it.
When I got to the neighbors I would call home. Yes, at first the phone would ring at least 25 times before Doug would pick it up. He’d answer it with a “hi.” I would say something like, “Hi, Doug, just checking to see if dad or anyone called.” Or perhaps I’d tell him when I’d be home. I did this many times over until he’d pick up the phone by the fifth ring.
Turn taking skills are not easy for the person with autism nor are they easy for the caregiver/professional to teach.
Go to The Story Shelf for some great informational and inspirational stories and strategies about turn taking.
